


𝖳he 𝐒ilence

by JKDiamondGold



Series: More 𝐿ight Than 𝐇eat [1]
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! Zexal
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Drama & Romance, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Post-Canon, Self-Indulgent, Short One Shot, This makes so little sense and I’m sorry., Umbrashipping, What on earth is this. What am I doing, Why do I feel like this fic will end up being less ‘’standalone’’ than I initially bargained, Why do I keep writing Astral as a sulking depresso espresso boy, Wrote this in the span of two days and it is likely not as good as I want to hope it is., hELP., they have a ship name i coined it there it is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:40:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23203366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JKDiamondGold/pseuds/JKDiamondGold
Summary: He was not made to know this gentle agony.He was not made to knowanypain, at all. To understand the complexity of what it meant to feel a hurt that could not be seen.
Relationships: Astral/Original Male Character
Series: More 𝐿ight Than 𝐇eat [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1668784
Kudos: 4





	𝖳he 𝐒ilence

He was not made to know this gentle agony.

He was not made to know _any_ pain, at all. To understand the complexity of what it meant to feel a hurt that could not be seen.

 _A mistake_ , they said, _side-effect of the chaos he chose not to disperse from his body._

Spoken matter-of-fact, a sweetness like sympathy dripping around the words, but a lack of sincerity to the emotion souring the supposedly innocent statement.

It was a coil. A fog in his chest. Thick, but not tangible. Breathable, but only barely so.

Always there, even in laughter, even in anger, even in everything.

Always.

~ {✧} ~

Soon, discussing the truth of the matter with anyone else staved off.

It was just easier.

It wasn't in his nature to be secretive, nor did he enjoy the weight of telling lies. Still, he’d felt burned too much by expressing the gravity of his … whatever this was within him. No one had understood, or made an effort to.

Astral supposed Enna’s concern rang true, and the most gravely. But he knew she would not wish to push him, and her refusal to approach him over the matter proved so.

_“What a sad, sorry sight~”_

His thoughts broke apart in shards of glass. _“…What?”_

Twisting, the envoy caught a movement between two pillars down the hall from which he came. Two eyes, deep blue and ghostly gray, seared into him unyielding, the figure moving from their place of hiding to show off a smug knowing expression. Energy of dark crimson fire lifted from the other’s skin, emitting a glow like some cursed flame. Chaos energy.

 _Him_.

 _“You,”_ Astral said, _“You are.. calling me pathetic.”_

His demonic doppelgänger grinned slow.

Rage spiraled in the envoy’s core. _“How dare you! After everything—!”_

 _“Tut, tut~ come now, little starling~ I thought you_ liked _observations.”_

 _“What you_ ‘observed’ _was nothing short of cruel!”_

 _“_ **_I_ ** _never called you pathetic.”_

Astral said nothing, an argument still ready on the edge of his tongue.

The half-dark being moved in close, unabashedly maintaining the electrical lock of their gazes. _“If it’s a fight you want, pretty one~ then may I suggest a change of battlefield?”_

~ {✧} ~

_“Never again.”_ Astral breathed, when the night was no longer young, hair splayed off the edge of the silken mattress as he tiredly felt the other shift to leave.

Fingers traced a mark on his cheek, a warm exhale fanning his face and echoing in goosebumps down his body. They kissed again once, twice, and on the third their lips melted together and overlapped wetly, leaving the envoy trembling.

There was laughter in the other’s throat when they parted, low and dark, and tinged in a wryness that stuttered Astral’s pulse.

_“Tomorrow, then~?”_

~ {✧} ~

It had become like a game, though Astral could not swear to that comparison, as he possessed no real idea of who was winning or losing at any given moment. If at all.

In the daylight, little ever changed.

Work would be done with Enna, and Eliphas as well. Meetings, political outings, communal outings, trivial matters resolved, and life around him carried on without difference.

Astral’s eyes, however, would rebel and betray him often. Gaze slicing the air in secret, sharpening towards the darkest corners in every room, searching for a glimpse of ** _him_** anywhere. Usually, Astral found himself both disappointed and irritated, though mostly directed towards himself.

The _feeling_ chased him all the while, crouched like a spider gearing for the lunge at its prey.

~ {✧} ~

They all assumed it was Yuma.

Didn’t matter that the anniversary was so long away, or how many decades it had been.

Not that Astral outright _blamed_ anyone for drawing correlation between the events, it was sprinkled in enough evidence to seem like truth. Letting them believe what they wished lifted a burden over fear of investigation in Astral’s mind.

They could have their theories, he found it a drastic upgrade from the constant questions and misunderstandings.

This pit, this _silence_ eating him inward out had no name that Astral knew to give, regardless.

~ {✧} ~

But in the twilight, when the shadows grew up the walls and shielded them in a blanket of darkness beneath shimmering stars, Astral gave himself, and all his strifes, to the person he least expected to be able to rival the empty void under his skin.

~ {✧} ~

It had started awhile ago.

Not the feeling. Astral’s other secret.

The exact date, and reason why, alluded them both now, it seemed.

Memories could be dastardly unreliable.They’d discussed it sparingly, a handful of occasions, nothing in depth enough to pinpoint concrete detail or specifics. Both were forced to agree that, somehow, along the way, it had just happened.

It didn’t help that neither really cared at this point.

~ {✧} ~

_“Describe it to me,”_ He asked Astral suddenly.

The alien of moon-like glow tensed, ease and peace from the other’s long touches fading from him like shooting stars.

_“I—… I cannot.”_

_“Astral,”_ The other growled, mouth sliding across the shell of his ear.

 _“No.”_ He spoke firm, muscles painfully taut.

“Astral,” The name came gentler from his lover’s lips, their noses bumping tenderly together.

Fear of _breaking_ consumed him. _“Please.”_

_“…Pain will always be felt until it is shared, darling.”_

_“But I—I-I do not know!”_ Eyes stung with red, blurring the lines in the ceiling. _“I don’t know what this is, I can’t—”_ The savior pressed his palms hard against his eyelids, tremors running down him in ripples. _“There is no defining it, no one true source. It is silent, unknown, and tangled in everything…”_

Arms gathered Astral tightly near, his face pushing up to the safety of the other’s chest, muffling choked, wet cries.

~ {✧} ~

Astral was so, so afraid _he_ wouldn’t return the next night.

The envoy had awoken to an empty space at his side.

All hours that passed in the light of that new day happened as if from somewhere beyond where he could grasp. Moving like the living dead, color and sound hit him in muted tones, and he knew his slacked behavior was drawing attention.

He did not pay anyone mind.

The Will of Astral World kept him distracted with lists of duties Astral needed to fulfill, otherwise _solitude_ remained his most trustworthy accomplice.

It was not late, but exhaustion struck early, siphoning the little energy he had to spare. Astral turned in for the night numbly.

When he crossed his room’s threshold, a sob climbed from his throat.

 _“Hush,”_ That purr filled Astral with thrill and relief, whimpers falling from his lips until he was securely wrapped around the chaos-corrupted spirit. Mouths parted, and the air his predecessor had gathered was breathed deep into his lungs, and Astral was lost.

~ {✧} ~

. . .

_“You are not alone.”_

_. . ._

~ {✧} ~

_“You seem different,”_ Enna commented much later, guiding the tips of her fingers over the railing of the balcony. “ _I cannot describe it perfectly, but you carry yourself in a way I haven't seen before.”_

Astral never did learn how best to deal with onslaughts of anxiety. _“I have felt… lighter lately. The gloom of previous months does not overwhelm me as often. Perhaps that is it.”_

 _“Yes,”_ Her gaze was resolute, and entirely too wise to miss the warmth filling his cheeks. _“Perhaps.”_

Within the uncomfortableness, he thought, lay the beginning of unspoken understanding.

That was more than good enough of a start.

~ {✧} ~

_“Am I_ boring _you~?”_

_“No.”_

_“Hmhm.”_

_“I am not bored, Ec—”_

_“You’re not present, either.”_

_“Do not interrupt me,”_ He hissed, sparking chuckles from the other. _“I was lost in thought.”_

 _“Ohoho~?”_ Smirking made his voice huskier, and Astral shivered in spite of the heat between them. _“Well, I’m afraid that’s still mightily insulting~ especially given how expertly I was worshiping your posterior a second ago~”_

The envoy’s face caught fire, shoving the variegated alien away with flustered demeanor. Any remark he attempted died weakly before it passed his lips, as he found them to be roughly stolen a moment later. Hands getting pinned above his head, Astral gasped out halfhearted pleas for his partner to stop, quivering beneath the rapid, hot kisses to his face and collar.

 _“Arrogant brute,”_ He whined, clinging to the male inflicting such pleasure and passion. _“…you know what you do to me.”_

 _“Hmm?”_ The sound rumbled like thunder from the heavens, teeth dragging across Astral’s shoulder. _“Do I now~?”_

Irises of gold and white collided with hues of blue and gray, limbs tangling, and breaths whispering in sync to a beat unheard by any but them two.

“ _Always._ ”

Always.

And that feeling, amplified in the silence, was quiet.

**Author's Note:**

> Have you ever procrastinated so hard on your fic that _a one-shot just is word-vomited from your fingertips._. 
> 
> Don’t ask me what this was, I myself have very little idea. There is a chance I’ll come back at some point to add more, I feel like it’s too much on the short side, but, ehhhh...
> 
> Anyway, since I’m going to be home a bunch in the coming days/weeks, I will be writing more diligently. Hopefully. Until next time!


End file.
